Way too many people are flying these days. They’re all flying Delta. And they’re all at my gate. My agoraphobia flares up and I literally run away. This happens from time to time, and when it does the answer is not the airline club lounges. I used to do that, and when I finally tired of paying fifty bucks to look at corpulent Business Class, it became quite clear, the solution almost poetically simple.

Go sit in another terminal.

This first occurred to me during a punishing overnight delay at Atlanta airport in January. Delta was hopelessly behind schedule and people were camping out like at some sort of music festival, only a less fun music festival where the only music is light jazz and all the food vendors are closed. I eavesdropped that all the nearby hotels were booked and as it was 1:00AM, not even my inner rage at Delta could fuel an 8-hour drive from Atlanta to Lexington. So I went back down to the “Plane Train” and headed to the Southwest terminal. Aside from airport custodial staff and a few fellow wanderers, it was empty. I found a couple of seats mercifully not divided by armrests and reclined and meditated on my hatred of Delta…

I used to love Delta. They were my domestic carrier of choice from 2010 to 2015. I was loyal. I was Silver Medallion. Then they changed their damned SkyMiles program to reward spending over loyalty, essentially doubling the amount of time and money an average person like me would need to spend to earn award travel. I look at them now mostly with contempt, as one would a boss you still have to work for after being turned down for a raise. I couldn’t sleep.

Today was a bit less dramatic.

Here’s some purgatory I encountered at Orlando International Airport:


And here’s the happy place I discovered:



I got some editing done, read a bit, and wrote this post. There was so much free space, some cool kids were able to rehearse a dance routine in the concourse.


Next time you find yourself overwhelmed by the disgruntled, disheveled, disorganized Delta masses, forgo the frenzy, skip the SkyClub, and try a new terminal.

Maybe that’s a metaphor about giving up on Delta.

Delta: Keep Clamoring.